Current Cricketers You have a SEVERE loathing against?

[Richard Jenkins]

Jenko's top ten
1) Warne
2) Boycott
3) Ted 'mars was in opposition' dexter
4) Merve Hughes. Looked like the drayman, bowled like his horse
5 Chris Lewis
6 Alex Stuart
7 Brett Lee
8 Imran Khan
9 Botham
10 Graeme Smith

All the above for arrogance/annoying me/bringing the game into disrepute/lazyness/etc

[DaveGillespie]

The most annoying thing about cricket today, now that I remember, is the noise the South African team make when celebrating a wicket. It's a unique noise, which manages to annoy me almost to the point of spontaneous combustion.

[yubeingfunny]

1) Graeme Smith - Looks like a bulldog chewing a wasp, acts like a 5 yr old
2) Mathew Hayden - Did i hear someone say he was a born again christian? I hope thats just a vicious rumor
3) Rob Key - Oi porky - leave that ball outside off stump alone, oops too late.. shame test players actually move the ball a bit
4) Sir Bob Geldof - Not a cricketer technically - but thinks he's Jes*s
5) Bono - see Sir Bob - only substitute Jes*s for GOD
6) Jacques Kallis - selfish, boring to watch, even when playing well
7) Steve Kirby - cheat, chucker, ********
8) Sami - OOH look how fast that was!!! pity it went even faster to the rope!
9) Shoaib - His own team dislike him - nuff said?
10) Brad Hogg - lets face it you are not Warne, you are not even as good as MacGill, you look like a rat
11) Glenn McGrath - how can such a good player be such an ********

[Mongoose]

Originally Posted by yubeingfunny

1) Graeme Smith - Looks like a bulldog chewing a wasp

I think the phrase is 'a bulldog licking **** off a thistle'

[Beny]

2) Mathew Hayden - Did i hear someone say he was a born again christian? I hope thats just a vicious rumor

Dont tell me that... Then I'll have to hate him too..

I dont think that it's true though.

11) Glenn McGrath - how can such a good player be such an ********

He's not an ********, just a smart ****. Most people who meet him reakon he one of the nicest guys going around.

[yubeingfunny]

Originally Posted by Beny

He's not an ********, just a smart ****. Most people who meet him reakon he one of the nicest guys going around.

I dont doubt that for a minute, most people say the same about him, its just his on-pitch persona that i dislike, and I'm more than willing to accept that similar things can be said about some of our players

[Wiljoy]

Originally Posted by The Worker

Gotta agree with NE about Brad Hogg. Ditto The Motherlands comments about the whole Gloucester team.

My personal bugbear is actually Shane Warne. Not the man himself, but just the way that everytime anyone even gets a bat on one of his deliveries, he acts like it was the luckiest shot ever played. And he gets far too many LBW's for a spinner. Must mean he's not turning it much......!

No, he can't turn the ball much, ask Mike Gatting !!

[Oliver]

Originally Posted by Wiljoy

No, he can't turn the ball much, ask Mike Gatting !!

I think the Worker was concerned by the number of "lbw"s that Warne gets.

It does seem odd given that he tends to pitch the ball outside leg, in order to remove the smartie-pants know-it-all Gatting-like chaps who are reputedley good at playing spin.
And yes he does get a lot of spin, as good leg-spinners do, and it must be so easy for top-class umpires (of whom there are very few, even amongst the Test panellists) to suddenly assume that the one that hit Vaughan (for instance) on the front pad was definitely going to go straight on.

Anyway that's another argument - I don't know if I can do ten:

1: Brett (I feel very apologetic about that inswinging beamer I chucked at Trescothick - that nearly hit him heh heh heh) Lee

2: Kerry (if I have a ridiculous laugh, they should keep employing me on the radio) O'Keeffe

3: Phil (I'm so fast that I can continually bowl short of a length and...: how come they keep spanking me to all parts?) de Freitas

4: Chris (I've shaved my head in the Caribbean and got sunstroke, how did that happen?) Lewis

5: Alec (I'm not extremely thick, I can't be... I played loads of times for England, several as the worst captain in the history of the game and I support Chelsea. And I only got into the side originally because my Dad was coach... ) Stewart. I could go on, in the brackets there, but I'd never finish.

6: Mark (I'm really the best cricketer in England, and I don't tell everybody all the time, but for some reason nobody likes me) Ramprakash. Actually I like Ramprakash too, but Rachael thinks he's God.

7: Graeme Smith and Mark Boucher (South African double-header there - twin back-bottoms, Smith for his irritating arrogance and Boucher for his appalling iron gloves and appealing every time he catches the ball, which is, let's face it, rather seldom.

8: Graham (BOFF four, BOFF four, "exciting cricket isn't it? Ghastly style, but jolly exciting") Gooch

9: Dermot (sniff, sniiiiiff, I can't remember a thing about last summer, but I am the greatest cricketer that ever, sniiiiiiff, sniff, drew breath) Reeve.

10: Greg ("look at my three-way weave - looks really natural, and I feel so much more confident") Matthews.

11: Craig (ugly sonamabeech arn-I, and not very fast) McDermott

12: Javed (whaddya mean lbw in my own country?) Miandad

Well, well, well and doubtless I could think of more... Lara (self-absorbed) Neal Radford & Robin Jackman (stupid run-ups) Neil Foster (don't get me started) Ian (I'm only playing because my brother was good) Greg...

Great thread, well done Motherland.

[Paoli]

Moin Khan- Biggest whinge to have ever played on a cricket field.
Nasser Hussain- Obviously dedicated and had high morals, but a bit of an ******** in my opinion.
Glenn McGrath- Not a severe loathing at all, but he'd almost cry after being hit for four up until recent times.
Shane Watson- Can't play, supposedly the next big thing for the last three years.
Robert Key- No good.
Geraint Jones- Simply not good enough and keeping at least two guys who should be in the team out of it.
Matthew Sinclair- Might as well play on a wheelchair for the amount he moves his feet.
Greg Matthews- "Advanced Hair, Yeah Yeah"
Dean Jones- Radical plans to change Victorian Cricket, get involved first mate!

[Richie Benauds Love Child]

Kallis - utter utter utter ******. Gives ****ty care-bear stares after he's bowled a long hop 4 foot outside off stump, and only bowls against crap teams. looks like an elderly former boy band member. hate him with a pasion

Cork - Did the same as kallis when he failed to swing the ball. Has the same effect on a dressing room as someone finding a turd in the showers. Caused all the good derbyshire players (we did have some!) to move.

G.Jones - not som uch him rather his awful interviews.