Annoying terms used by commentators

[greg]

Can't stand Blofeld.Why does he go on about damn pigeons?Who cares,they are the vermin of the sky anyway.Also how often has Blofeld gone on about his own career only for it to be a pack of lies?

[Paoli]

Mark Nicholas annoys the hell out of me when he excessively uses the word "stroke". Fair enough to a little paddle, but every single shot, no matter how big it is, he uses it. For example, when Flintoff smacked Lee out of the ground at Edgbaston, MN followed it up with a "A brilliant stroke". Surely, a hit out of the ground constitutes a shot?

Batters annoys the hell out of me. The term is batsman and should be used at all times; batters isn't even proper English. Five-Fer, Six-Fer, Eight-Fer or Three-Fer and so on doesn't bother me. Also cannot believe that such a boring person like Richie Benaud got the best commentator. He is a boring, boring, monotonous old man who, whilst having a high knowledge of the game, isn't much of a star behind the mic. This could land me in hot water by other posters, but one think that has always buggered me is his monotony.

Faults in the Australian Commentary Team:

AW Greig: Anyone ever noticed when he must have something stuck in his throat and his voice goes a whole notch deeper? That and "Up She Goes".
Ian Healy: Knows little about commentating and his overuse of the telestrator marked with the words "right about....theree"
Bill Lawry: No faults. Just a huge nose and a "Ohh His gone, yes, got him, gone".
Mark Taylor: Cannot pronounce any non-anglo names correctly. Vusi Sibanda turned into Voozi Simbanda, Irfan Pathan into Earfan Pethen and Salman Butt into Samon But.
Ian Chappell: Spends half an hour boring people on how to catch a ball, or, how his grandfather told him: "When you win the toss, 9 times out of ten you bat, the tenth time, you contemplate bowling, but you bat anyhow"

[Andy Mellon]

Originally Posted by Paoli69

AW Greig: Ian Healy: Bill Lawry: Mark Taylor: Ian Chappell:

What a dream team! I'd love to hear some Aussie commentary! Shame they haven't got Thommo and Alderman as well!

Seriously though, I've not heard Healy or Taylor, but they sound pretty annoying from your description. As I remember, Healy had a bit of an annoying voice as well.... but I might be getting mixed up. I think I've said before that Merv Hughes is a surprisingly good commentator, as is Geoff Lawson. Both on the right side of supporting Australia, but giving credit to the opposition where it's due (unlike a certain Mr. Alderman!)

Criticism of Blowers is true, but I'd still prefer him rather than Mark Nicholas, Dermot Reeve and anyone on Sky other than Gower and maybe Bumble. Allott, Colville, Willis and Nasser are very self-righteous and annoying, whilst there are much better West Indian commentators than Holding (Wayne Daniel, Tony Cozier, Ian Bishop and a female commentator I heard on TalkSport when England last toured the WI whose name I can't remember who was excellent - anyone know her name? - actually, it may have been on TMS when WI toured Eng? Still, any one with a clue who she is?)

[Oliver]

Originally Posted by Andy Mellon

whilst there are much better West Indian commentators than Holding (Wayne Daniel, Tony Cozier, Ian Bishop and a female commentator I heard on TalkSport when England last toured the WI whose name I can't remember who was excellent - anyone know her name? - actually, it may have been on TMS when WI toured Eng? Still, any one with a clue who she is?)

Ah yes she's the one that I keep remembering as Nina Simone.

Donna Simmonds (not sure about the "D" in the surname) is the melifluous accented woman to whom you are referring.

She sounds lovely.

[Ninjaman]

Her name is Donna Simmons. She's very good.

[Ninjaman]

Beat me to it!!

What lies is Blofeld supposed to have told??

[greg]

He kept going on about keeping wicket at Lords in a minor counties final and his minor county weren't in the final for 5 years either side of when he said it was.Draw your own conclusion.

[Oliver]

Right that's DONNA SYMONDS apparently.

[Oliver]

Originally Posted by greg

He kept going on about keeping wicket at Lords in a minor counties final and his minor county weren't in the final for 5 years either side of when he said it was.Draw your own conclusion.

Blofeld was involved in a fairly serious skirmish with a car while, or shortly after, he was at university. I understand that his head took most of the impact, or at least quite a sizeable percentage of it.

That he speaks at all is something of a miracle, and that he retains his particular manner of witty intelligence is really rather wonderful.

He "goes on about" pidgeons because it is the radio commentator's job to paint a picture for those without the benefit of actually being there. He is merely describing everything before him.

And I think he does it very well.

[Andy Mellon]

Thanks Oliver and Ninjaman.

Unfortunately, you couldn't vote for her at all in the Wisden Cricketer poll. However, a subsequent comment was made by a reader

Originally Posted by Bruce Walker

I can't believe no mention has yet been made of the best commentator in world cricket: Donna Symonds. This lady from Barbados puts nearly all of her contemporaries deep into the shade, both with her insightful commentary, and her very easy-to-listen-to voice

I have to agree with everything he says. Fantastic voice and great knowledge and insight.